The OTHER Immigration

*This blog is a slight departure from our story (although it is completely a part of it)! I just need to rant for a bit...

What could be worse than spending your one-year wedding anniversary alone? How about spending the entire first year of your marriage alone (well, as alone as one can possibly be when she’s the mother of seven). Since the day we “tied the knot,” Paco and I have hardly been in the same country (let alone the same Macaroni Grill) to celebrate a birthday, Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day, or even Groundhog’s Day. Why should I have expected last Sunday—the first anniversary of our marriage—to be any different? And why are we even separated in the first place (a forced separation, I might add)?

Good question. And the answer is simple—because I’m American, and he’s not. Now if I were Elizabeth Gilbert of Eat, Pray, Love fame, Paco and I might have wandered throughout Asia as our attorney filed the various waves of paperwork required in the vast ocean of legal immigration documentation. But wait—we don’t even have an attorney. Who can afford one?

Paco and I took the self-serve line through checkout at USCIS (United States Citizenship and Immigration Services)—not necessarily the quickest route for your loved one to enter the US boarders legally, but definitely less expensive (not to be confused with inexpensive). Besides, how romantic would Asia have been with our nine offspring in tow? I mean—do the McDonald’s in Asia even have a Playplace?

And then there are our jobs (well, my job in particular) necessary not only to fund those visits to McDonald’s, but necessary for the income, which is necessary for the Affidavit of Support (a.k.a. I-134), which is necessary for me to qualify to have my husband and two step-daughters live with me, which, for me is a definite necessity! Never mind that Paco has an economics degree and is a respected executive in Peru’s insurance industry. This is of no importance to USCIS. It’s my income that counts in this process. Huh?

With illegal immigration such a hot topic in this country, few consider the plight of those of us attempting to play by the rules…even at the greatest-of-all personal cost—extensive separation from the ones we love most. Why does this process have to be so complicated and drawn out? I understand the need to maintain national security—I never want to see images like those of 9/11 repeated. But we’re in month 9 of this application process (it took a few months after the wedding for Paco to gather up the initial documents, then have them stamped and sealed by Peru’s External Affairs, and finally translated—a time consuming and expensive process that every document must go through). How long will this go on? How long will I have to rely on a webcam to look into my husband’s eyes every night? When will we finally be together? When can we live our happily ever after?

Not only can I not afford an attorney to fill out and file our immigration paperwork, I can’t afford a therapist to help me deal with this most difficult year of my life. Instead, I write—this is my therapy and helps me feel closer to my husband. You can read our lost-and-found love story on my blog: www.mommygringa.blogspot.com . All I want is to have my not-so-little family together. When will the government finally get out of the way, and let this happen?